Anonymous: What inspires you to use your creativity? What do you think the differences between love and lust are? (Sexually). What's your favorite song and why? Do you ever listen to a song and feel so much emotion through it and you just want to express it, and write it everywhere, but the words don't do it justice because the emotion and make-up of the production of the song is what makes you feel that way in the first place?
When I picture myself in the future I see myself in some weird house/apartment with paintings all around me and it makes me want to get in a groove where I am at now. Also when I am really distraught and hating something I am doing I begin to yearn for something creative, because the process is so emotional/reflective versus boring and stupid. Wow great questions hmmmm I believe lust to be much more clouded and unashamedly honest. Like it hits you and you are forced to confront it because it overwhelms you. I think love is something more developed. You learn to love someone and experience them fully (not that I’d really know), like details about them become so special, like maybe a freckle on their back, just holding and inspecting their hand, feeling the contour of their neck to shoulder. It is more than just rapid instinctual sex. It is free and and willing. Not that lust is completely devoid of meaning; just loving someone I imagine would feel emotionally rewarding, like a hug from someone you have missed for years or staying up for hours talking to a close companion. I also don’t think loving someone sexually has finish in an orgasm, I think learning and engaging the person becomes really meaningful. Uhhhh my favorite song, jeez, really tough, ultimately I’d pick Knights by Crystal Castles. It is such a poppin’ song, but songs really connect to the time I first got into them. The people I surrounded myself with when I really jammed out to Knights loved me so well in an awful time of my life. It just makes me so joyful to listen to and you can totally dance to it. YEAH to the whole listening to a song and feeling so much emotion and you want to explode in so much feeling. Wow, music is so nostalgic for me, like when I saw Future Islands live they sang Walking Through That Door and I was with a close friend and I couldn’t help but be awestruck. Songs that do this to me aren’t always songs I’d expect either. Suffocation by Crystal Castles (but slowed down), Andreas by Seahaven (the lyrics make me yearn for so much), Amenamy by Purity Ring (even the Jon Hopkins remix of it too), Outside by TOPS (lyrics again shoot), and honestly any song that reminds me of my mom I cannot bear to listen to unless I know I can be safe and have time to possibly break down or be still/quiet (like Morning Morgantown by Joni Mitchell and others). Thank you anon, you’re really cool
Anonymous: How are you doing? Deep down.
aw man. deep down, things are really stirring up. I am developing something that I know will be very destructive to me, but I still am following through with it and it is starting to manifest itself. I have had a couple of conversations testing boundaries of people I am close to. I am starting to recognize a lot of twisted concepts I have been shamed to believe from things in my past, or environments around me. I feel uncertain and a strange loneliness, like I can’t fully be known right now. It upsets me. I am beginning to harbor secret thoughts of anger to people around me because of views they hold that really hurt me. However I am also opening up to people I haven’t about some really personal things and they are not running away from me and that is nice to know. It is freeing. I want to be more alone in this season of my life, that’s okay with me
Anonymous: Where would you most like to skinny dip?
hmmmm it would be so cool to skinny dip in some at this pool next to this lodge and barn from a summer camp that I worked at. Honestly it could be anywhere, but in a forest would be the best, also it needs to be at night, because it is more special.It depends more on the people you do it with.